My Name In Print

I distinctly remember the first time I knew I was a lover of words and stories.  I was a first grader, and Miss Kennedy's daily readings of Uncle Wiggily stories sent me into a head-over-heels plunge.  I was read to constantly as a child, but at 6 years old I took ownership of the love, and books became my best friends.

Soon I began to be drawn to writing.  Spelling came naturally to me as did grammar, not to mention I was that kid who thought writing in cursive was the coolest thing ever. I liked sentences and the way words sounded when put together.  As a fifth grader I was given a writing assignment by my Language Arts teacher; I had no idea it was an essay competition until the day I was called out of class and informed that I had won the S.C. Lt. Governor's Award for Excellence in Descriptive Writing.  My career aspirations took root as an 11-year-old when I made it known that I was going to be an English teacher and a writer.

Three years later, as an eighth grader, I won the Lt. Governor's Award award again, this time for Expository Writing.  For a brief moment I dared to believe that I had been gifted with the talent of writing and allowed myself to dream of someday being a 'real' writer.  But before I could finish basking in the glow of my newborn dream, harsh criticism (in the form of whispers of other 14-year-olds, behind my back, but just loud enough for me to hear, saying the only reason I won was because my father was the school district superintendent) delivered a devastating blow.  Fear, shame and embarrassment engulfed me and my dream crashed and burned - I believed the whispers.

Still a devout lover of words and stories and language, yet devoid of all confidence that I could produce anything of worth, I focused my energy on the teaching part of the dream, allowing it to be a conduit for my passion.  I didn't abandon writing altogether; I wrote in journals, I wrote sample essays for my students, I wrote poetry, I wrote letters, I wrote stories.  I wrote constantly, but for a highly controlled, severely limited audience.  The general public wouldn't see my writing again for more than 20 years. 

When I spent my first summer in Peru in 2006, some friends asked if I would journal the experience and share my entries with them (this was before blogging became popular, and before most people had even heard the word 'blog').  I agreed and my writings about my time in the jungle began circulating among close friends via email.  For the next two summers I continued my email journaling while my reader base expanded.  By 2009 I was living in Peru as a full-time missionary.  'Blog' had become a household word and the act of 'blogging' was an expectation in the world of foreign missions and its supporters.  So I launched my first official blog and my writing was now reaching an even larger audience.

Somewhere between late 2014 and early 2015 I caught a glimpse of something.  A flicker in my mind's eye.  A faint glimmer.  A distant memory.  I thought it was dead, buried long ago as an unrealistic whim of an idealistic teenager.  Some encouraging words here and there and a few comments of "You should write a book" and "You know, you're a really good writer" caused me to search the recesses of my brain and dig deep into my heart.  What I discovered was that the dream I thought had crashed and burned 30 years earlier was still there.  How was that even possible?

And so, with a lot of counsel and even more prayer, I took a bold step back in October by wiping the slate clean, starting this brand new blog, committing to writing, and investing in a gift that God intends for me to develop and use.  My first major commitment has been to the discipline of writing - thus the 2016 calendar year will see 52 posts made to my blog - one each week as I train myself to write on a regular basis rather than on emotion or whim.  Another aspect of this part of my journey with God has been creating a vision for at least one book and making a plan to bring it to fruition.  A third leg of this dream revived is honing my craft as an editor.  It's a leap of faith.  I'm scared.  And this time the whisperers aren't teenage classmates; the wolves that would threaten to eat me are bigger and meaner.  But that's ok.  

Once I told the Lord that I was ready for the next adventure with Him, He began to throw open doors of confirmation.  He's provided me with one miraculous 'coincidence' after another letting me know that I am, indeed, following the sweet sound of the Holy Spirit's voice.  One of the first miraculous coincidences was meeting and becoming friends with Brenda McGraw - writer, author, and founder of Ask God Today Ministries - whose enthusiasm and positive energy are contagious.  From the moment we met she has encouraged and challenged me in my writing.  Another miraculous coincidence was being introduced to a writer and author from Texas named Sandy Kreps.  Sandy took a chance and gave me, an unknown nobody, an opportunity to edit her new book, Mommy Simplicity.  I celebrate the publication of Sandy's book because it is amazing (I will write in more detail about the book next week), but also because, contained in its pages is my name in print, an acknowledgement of me as her editor - a huge step toward my dream coming true... 


(*Sandy's book is currently available on Amazon.com for pre-order in both Kindle and Paperback formats and will be available for immediate sale on Wednesday, January 27.  Click the book title link above to purchase your copy.)  

A New Verse

Happy New Year!

If you're like me, by the end of the year you're tired, worn out, and in need of some renewal and a fresh start.  All the holiday hoopla is over and you're facing a new year.  Will it really be any different from the previous 365 days?  Or will it be a 'same verse, different tune' kind of thing?  Maybe you make resolutions and keep them, then measure your success and celebrate.  Or perhaps your good intentions crash and burn before you've even finished the left over black-eyed peas and collard greens.

As for me - I don't just want 2016 to be different; I need it to be different.  More importantly, I sense God telling me it is His will for it to be different.  My husband feels the same way.  A year from now we don't want to take stock of our lives and find we are in pretty much the same place - stagnant and full of 'what-ifs,' regretting all that we did NOT do. Instead, we want to have stepped out in faith, into the abundant life that God has promised us. But where do we start?  How do we get there from here?

The Mini Marriage Retreat!

While it would be nice to participate in an organized, planned and targeted retreat, or even to drop our son off at a grandparent's house and run to the coast for a winter getaway by the ocean to plan our coming year, our budget doesn't allow for that at this time.  (We know friends who've enjoyed structured marriage conferences, and others who've conducted their own marriage retreats/planning getaways; we highly recommend either when they are realistic options.)  But time away from home wasn't possible for us, so we borrowed from our friends' plans, then added a dash of our own styles and personalities to create a meaningful time together that did not require leaving town, or our own living room for that matter.

Here's a peek into our personalized retreat in the week leading up to New Year's Eve:

• In our own time and our own way, we each took a few days to pray and think about our lives as individuals, as a couple, and as parents.  Separately we asked God to show us what He wanted us to take away from 2015, as well as what He wants us to take into 2016.  This time included some serious introspection and brutal honesty with God and ourselves - not necessarily fun, but always productive. 
• After several days of meeting with God individually it was time to put Toby to bed, then put pen to paper.  We turned off all electronics and prayed together.  Without discussing anything, we spent the next hour or so writing 3-5 specific goals in each of the following categories:  Personal, Work, Marriage, Family and Finance.  
• The next day Little Man got to spend an entire day playing with a friend while Collins and I enjoyed some time to ourselves.  We cooked brunch, drank coffee, talked, enjoyed uninterrupted, individual quiet times, prayed together, ran errands, and put the finishing touches on our goals from the previous night.  
• We picked up Toby, then had dinner and some family play time.  Once little man was fast asleep, we turned on the Christmas lights, diffused some relaxing essential oils, turned off all electronics and settled in for some quality time together. We devoted the remainder of the evening to sharing our goals in each category, discussing what we had each written and coming to an agreement on common goals for the Marriage, Family and Finance categories.  We also determined ways we could support and encourage each other in our respective Personal and Work goals.  Be assured that not all of our conversation was easy and free-flowing, as this kind of soul-searching opens the door for God to reveal some unpleasant things that must be addressed.  We incorporated a couple of breaks into the evening for times when things got heavy and even uncomfortable (stepping outside and taking a few deep breaths under a starry sky does wonders for your attitude and perspective!).

In a week's time we invested significantly in our personal walks with the Lord, in our marriage and in our family - a mini marriage retreat in the comfort of our own home.  (Let it be noted, however, that when we are able to have a true, out-of-town escape, you'll find me on the beach squishing some cold sand between my toes - it makes those difficult discussions a little less painful!)  

I'm positive that I speak for both Collins and myself when I say it was time well-spent and one of the best things we've ever done for our relationship.  I also feel safe in saying it was the inaugural year of a rich, new tradition!

Perhaps the crowning moment of our in-home marriage building was asking God to lead us to scripture that spoke to both of our hearts about where we currently are in our journey with Him.  We prayed for a passage to ponder and a verse we will memorize and meditate on daily in the new year.  He delivered...  

Let us not become weary in doing good, 

for at the proper time we will reap a harvest 

if we do not give up.

Galatians 6:9
(Galatians 6:1-10)